13 December 2002

So this afternoon I was reading the diary critic'sold entries and finding interesting online journals... The two best so far are Soap which is really quite a fascinating read and makes me nostalgic for the college life i never had. Somewhat soap opera-ish, but fun to read in a very guilty pleasure sort of way, exactly the sort of way reading someone else's very private diary should feel. The other one is Soliloquy, which is written by a surprisingly intellegent and literate 14 year old, but with at least the usual amount of 14-year old screwedupedness, and reminds me of the highschool life i did have (as in the friends i had, not as in me). I'm a sucker for using "innocence" and "regret" to mean back and forward respectively. This recent entry on cutting was really powerful and made me squirm (nohting bothers me as much as slow violence... well nothing except the last half an hour of vertigo) and makes me more and more worried about how on earth i'm going to manage to be a passable parent to a 14 year old girl. Sometimes I wonder if this can possibly be a real 14 year old, or if its just someone writing a fiction to keep in practice for novel writing, but its too real, and looking back i remember people who were smart and articulate then and whose diary's just might have looked like this.

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