Just got back from an amusing party at Albert's amazing apartment on the Upper East Side. I did commit what seems to have been, in retrospect, a social faux pas. Things are going well; I'm mingling capably among old friends and new, even coming off as halfway charming...when, in response to a random question from a circle of strangers, drink in hand, I overhear myself launching into the Tom Cruise Speech. You know: the one where I insist that Tom Cruise is the most underrated actor in Hollywood, a fascinating figure with a brilliant career, etc., etc. Everyone slowly backs away....